"Transfiguration," Rafael. Wiki

To levitate

Sit cross-legged on the floor
Eight hours or more
And hypnotise the tip of your nose
Whilst wiggling your toes.

Fill your mind with mindfulness
Or mindlessness,
Believe in self-raising flower power
And step off the tower

Or maybe not.
Perhaps inhale an awful lot
Of steam instead
Followed by helium to lighten your head

Or be ever so quiet,
Go on a vegan vacuum diet,
Shave off your hair,
Put your hands together in prayer

And as you start to self-leaven,
Devoutly raise your eyes to heaven.
Then in take-off position
Turn over your telly to aerial vision

And start to scale the heights of Zen,
But even then
Never underestimate
How hard it is


Last night, when I was pissed,
I had a vision
in which God told me
he doesn’t exist.

As a lapsed Catholic
I was rather shocked
but God was emphatic:
He is not to be mocked.

I had to believe
in God’s atheist word.
Not to do so seemed

But today I reverted
to being agnostic
because, as you’ve heard,
when I had the vision last night,

I was pissed.


If Jesus were to come back now
to Earth from Paradise
would his first words be hey wow
or just be Jesus Christ?


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