Boris Jonsn z a teṛbl līdr. It dz’nt matr.
(Transcription of a New York Times article of June 11, 2021)
LUNDN — Boris Jonsn, Britn’z frīẃīlñ, clǎniś prîm̦inistr, z abt t ple host.
Saḿl R̋l, Jūn 11, 2021
On Jūn 11, ɖ de aftr a prîṿt mītñ wɖ Prezidnt Bîdn, Mr Jonsn z scejld t welcm uɖr Grūp v 7 līdrz t Cornẉl, on ɖ sǎʈ-wstn cǒst v Ñgḷnd, t dscus clîṃtćenj, ɖ globl pandemic rcuṿri n ɖ rtrit v libṛl dmocṛsi arnd ɖ wrld.
Yt Mr Jonsn me hv uɖr ʈñz on hiz mînd. Ovr ɖ past fy munʈs, a siriz v scandlz n aḷgeśnz hz pt ɖ prîm̦inistr undr unyźl preśr. Ɖr hv bn akześnz v c’rupśn, rports v bitr rîvlriz on hiz closist tīm n, t top it of, xplosiv tstiṃni fṛm hiz formr ćīf advîzr, Doṃnic Cumñz, ɖt leid rsponsbiḷti fr ɖ hanḍlñ v ɖ pandemic in Britn — ẃr ovr 125,000 ppl hv daid v Covid-19 — sqerli at Mr Jonsn’z dor. Stori bî stori, scandl bî scandl, Mr Jonsn hz bn xpozd az a slapdaś, vīnl, incompitnt līdr.
Bt it dz’nt sīm t matr. Ɖ Cnsrṿtivz, dspt ɖ cntrovsi, r stl cumftbli ahd in ɖ poulz — n īvn manijd t dfit ɖ opziśn Lebr Parti in a rīsnt bîilex́n, clemñ ɖ norʈīstn cnstitẏnsi v Hartḷpul fr ɖ frst tîm. N Mr Jonsn, fr ol ɖ ǎtrej n acriṃni, cn grīt hiz felo globl līdrz in a spirit v trîumf. Wɖ hlʈi apruvlretñz n at ɖ hlm v a parti bostñ an 80-sīt mjoṛti, hiz pǎr z aśurd.
Gvn Mr Jonsn’z inaptitude fr ofis, bresñli iluṃnetd bî Mr Cumñz’z tstiṃni, ɖt’s qt rmarcbl. Spīcñ t Parḷmnt fr ovr sevn aurz on Me 26, Mr Cumñz, hu mastrmîndd Mr Jonsn’z ilex́n win in Dsmbr 2019 — bt hu wz ǎstd fṛm hiz rǒl az ćīf advîzr a yir lêtr — tòr intu ɖ guvnmnt’s caṭstrofic mshanḍlñ v ɖ pandemic, iviṣretd ɖ prîm̦inistr’z caṛctr n dclerd him “unfit fr ɖ job.”
Mr Jonsn’z iniśl fełr t tec ɖ vîṛs sirịsli z wel dokmntd, bt sm v ɖ dītelz wr stl astoṇśñ. Acordñ t Mr Cumñz, Mr Jonsn iniṣ́li clemd ɖt ɖ c’roṇvîṛs “z onli cilñ 80-yir-oldz” n wontd t b injctd wɖ ɖ c’roṇvîṛs lîv on teḷviźn t śo ɖt ɖr wz nʈñ t wuri abt. (Az it hapnd, Mr Jonsn cntractd ɖ vîṛs in lêt Marć n spent a wīc in a hospitl.)
Ɖ reṿleśnz cem agnst a bacdrop v rports xpozñ ɖ Cnsrṿtivz’ doji dīlñz jrñ ɖ pandemic: Covid-19 contracts wrʈ biłnz v pǎndz gwñ t frendz v Cnsrṿtiv lwmecrz wɖ no xpirịns in ɖ hlʈsectr, biznistîcūnz wɖ d’rect lînz t ɖ prîm̦inistr t pś ɖer inṭrests n a laviś reṇveśn v ɖ prîm̦inistr’z rezidns at Dǎnñ Strīt ɖt involvd a sīcrit dneśn bî a Tori bacr. Tōc v slīz n Britn’z “ćumocṛsi” hz prmietd īvn ɖ tipicli loyl pejz v ɖ rît-wñ pres.
Bt Mr Jonsn (huz repyteśn fr nt jst svîvñ c’rir-endñ cntrovsiz bt ʈrîvñ on ɖm hz ŕnd him nicnemz lîc “Teflon Jonsn,” “Hūdīni” n, les flatrñli, “ɖ grīst piglit”) hz cǒstd ʈru ɖ trbyḷns. Ingulft in scandl, un’seḷbli popylr — ɖs hz olwz bn ɖ esns v brand Boris. In hiz tstiṃni, Mr Cumñz rcōld cmplenñ t Mr Jonsn ɖt ɖ hanḍlñ v ɖ pandemic wz “ceos.” “Ceos z’nt ɖt bad,” ɖ prîm̦inistr rplaid, acordñ t Mr Cumñz. “Ceos mīnz ɖt evrwn hz t lc t m t si hu’z in ćarj.”
Ɖ ceos me sūt Mr Jonsn, bt fr Britn it hz bn devstetñ. Ɖ ultiṃt prūf v ɖ prîm̦inistr’z felñz jrñ ɖ pandemic lîz nt wɖ Mr Cumñz bt in ɖ concrīt numbrz: Mr Jonsn hz léd Britn t wn v ɖ hîist Covid deʈrets in ɖ wrld, oṿsīn wn ɖ wrst ic̣nomic dǎntrnz in ɖ Grūp v 7 n impozd ɖ ʈrd-strictist locdǎn gloḅli. Ɖ s’xes v ɖ neśn’z vax̣neśnprogram — Britn hz dlivrd mor dosz ɖn eni uɖr cuntri in Yṛp — hz let Mr Jonsn rīfrem ɖs traɉdi az a trîumf. Bt fr tnz v ʈǎzndz v grīvñ faṃliz, it cmz az litl conṣleśn.
Yt fr ol ɖ sṗsific pkliaṛtiz v Mr Jonsn’z prsona — a diziyñ blend v dspśn, bṛvādo n slf-depriceśn — ɖ jarñ diṣnns ɖt dfînz hiz guvnmnt, at wns ilectṛli s’xesfl n soṣ́li dstructiv, z nt ptiklr t ɖ cuṛnt prîm̦inistr. In mni wez, it z ɖ stori v ɖ modn Cnsrṿtiv Parti. Ɖ parti’z fǎndñ promis, leid dǎn in Roḅt Pīl’z Tamwrʈ Maṇfsto in 1834, wz t stop Britn fṛm bcmñ a “ppćl vortx v ajteśn.” Sins ɖ Cnsrṿtivz rgend pǎr in 2010, Britn hz bcm jst ɖt, wɖ tū reḟrenḍmz, ʈri prîm̦inistrz n for jenṛl ilex́nz.
Ɖ Cnsrṿtivz hv fluriśt in ɖz cndiśnz, winñ ć jenṛl ilex́n sins 2010 wɖ a larjr śer v ɖ vot ɖn ɖ last. Bt ɖ spôlz v vicṭri hv nt bn wîdli śerd. Wejz hv nt rizn agnst infleśn fr ɖ longist pirịd sins ɖ Npolionic ira, a ʈrd v ćildṛn nǎ gro p in poṿti, n stetwelfér z nǎ wn v ɖ stinjiist in ɖ dveḷpt wrld.
In Cornẉl, ẃr Mr Jonsn wl host ɖ Grūp v 7 līdrz in a btīc sìsîd hotel, Britn’z sośl n ic̣nomic miẓri z plen fr ol t si. In 2008, Cornẉl wz wn v ʈri eriaz in ɖ Ynîtd Cñdm t sufr amñ ɖ wrst levlz v depṛveśn in Yṛp; nǎ it z wn v sevn. N ɖ numbr v nebrhdz in Cornẉl ɖt ranc amñ ɖ most dprîvd in Ñgḷnd hz mor ɖn dubld sins 2010. Acrs ɖ cuntri, Tori rūl hz cǒinsîdd wɖ a cōrṣnñ v livñcndiśnz.
Stl, ɖ Cnsrṿtivz swagr on, unṗtrbd, mbi īvn eṇjîzd, bî ɖ ceos n depṛveśn arnd ɖm. Ɖ vot t līv ɖ Yṛpiyn Yńn in 2016 — léd, oṗtynisticli, bî Mr Jonsn — rīcnfigrd ɖ ilectṛl map n rījuṿnetd ɖ Cnsrṿtiv Parti. Brexit’s “Yir Ziro” ifct, az wn Cnsrṿtiv ministr pt it, alaud ɖ parti t riinvnt itslf az an anti-istabliśmnt fors, ẃl rtenñ its wlʈi bacrz, n t tap intu ɖ drīmz n añzaytiz v Ñgliś naśṇlizm mor pswesivli.
Dspt ol ɖ haṿc ɖ Cnsrṿtivz hv cōzd, ɖ parti z in a strongr pziśn ɖn evr. N Mr Jonsn — ɖ man hu sīmz onli evr t fel upwd, blunḍrñ fṛm wn s’xes t ɖ nxt — z at its bìtñ hart. Hiz felolīdrz, fy v hūm pzes cmpaṛbl s’kṛti, me wel lc on envịsli.
***
Mr R̋l z a jrṇlist hu raits ofn abt Britn’z poḷtics n culćr.
***
